If you’re here, it’s likely because you didn’t get some (or any) of the Sporcle Dad jokes. Well here is a guide to just what the heck was going on in that tiny little dad brain when it comes to artists. If you haven’t yet played the “Sporcle Dad Talks Artists” quiz, head over to Sporcle first to see how you do.
Do you like Red Grooms?
Sure, who doesn’t love the Galloping Ghost?
Red Grooms, American sculptor
Red Grange, American football player, the “Galloping Ghost”
Do you like Gainsborough?
Never been. That’s in Florida, right?
Florida, a lame reference to Gainesville and some random ‘boro.
Do you like Dalí?
Yes, but I really hate that Jolene chick.
Salvador Dalí, Spanish surrealist
Do you like Hopper?
Yes, all those little bugs were so cute.
Edward Hopper, American painter
Hopper, the evil (but still kinda cute) grasshopper from A Bug’s Life
Do you like Munch?
Yes, Tony Shaloub was great in that.
Hindsight punchline: Yes, Tony Shaloub was a scream in that.
Edvard Munch, Norwegian painter, famed for The Scream
Just For Fun
Do you like Rodin?
Yes, he’s way cooler than Godzilla.
Do you like Stella?
No, I never got what all the shouting was about.
Frank Stella, American painter
Stella Kowalski is a character in Tennessee Williams‘ masterpiece play A Streetcar Named Desire. The best known scene from the play (and subsequent film) involves Marlon Brando, playing Stella’s husband Stanley, standing below her window calling her name, “Steellaaaaaa!”
Do you like Pissarro?
No, that armor’s just too over the top.
Camille Pissarro, Danish-French impressioniist
Do you like da Vinci?
Yes, that was a great book.
Do you like French?
No, no hablo francés.
Daniel Chester French, American sculptor, best known for the statue of Abraham Lincoln in the Lincoln Memorial
“No, no hablo francés” means “No, I don’t speak French.” In Spanish.
Do you like Pollock?
Yes, they’re rich in omega-3 fatty acids.
Jackson Pollock, American painter, famous for his unusual style of “drip painting”
Pollock, a tasty North Atlantic fish
Do you like Leroy Neiman?
Yes, he’s funny, but I wouldn’t want him on my raid.
Leroy Neiman, American painter, famous for his colorful paintings of sports, athletes, and musicians
Do you like Botticelli?
Oh yes, especially with white sauce.
Sandro Botticelli, Italian Renaissance painter famous for The Birth of Venus
Do you like Church?
No, I prefer pagan rites myself.
Frederic Edwin Church, American landscape painter, member of the Hudson River School
Paganism was originally a derogatory term for non-Abrahamic religions. Today it is at least somewhat more accepted as Modern Paganism. While rites are involved, they are generally less formal than church.
Do you like Saint-Gaudens?
I don’t know. Is that the day with the trees?
Arbor Day because trees. Trees because plants. Plants because gardens. Gardens because Saint-Gaudens. Saint-Gaudens because sometimes you’re desperate for one last dumb joke.